Pandarion and Zen

Well, Pandarion is Pandarion, but Zen is subjective



ps--Pandarion, aka Panda-lion to those english speakers, was a gift from my ex-flatmate Aussie Chris, available at any respectable Mister Donut. "Flatmate" was a shout out, because the correct term is obviously roommate, despite the fact that we never shared a room. Well, I did take his room after he left, but that's beside the point. We weren't mates in a "flat" sense either. Always full of dimension.

pppppppppppps--While the sign at Mister Donut may say "Established in San Francisco", I've never seen one in the States, and neither has anyone I know. Plus, I say "Mr. Donuts".

Cell Phone Self-Portraits

It's so strange to think I'll be leaving Japan soon. Only 17 days until I'm on that plane. It's all been incredibly bittersweet. Initially everything was so exciting, and then things became routine, almost mundane. Then I made the big change to assistant language teacher and moved back to Osaka. Granted, it's been a wonderful experience, but not exactly what I needed it to be. I suppose I expected to come to some grand revelation about my life here, and that hasn't happened. I'm still as confused about life as I was before I came here. Guess that's just the way the cookie crumbles. How does that cliche breakdown for those Brits who say biscuit? Someone, please, enlighten me.

This weekend has been about books, dvds, relaxation and reflexion. Made my way through High Fidelity, TV People, Sproing!, Christopher Columbus Discovers America, the beginning of Great Expectation, Blue Velvet, Frida, Jackie Brown and Lock Stock & Two Smoking Barrels. Sounds busy, but not at all.

I can't believe monday is Halloween, and I've opted for the quiet life...so unlike me. Or maybe it's the epitome of the current state of Stephen-ness. Who can say? I certainly can't.

So much is going through my head, it's hard to compartmentalze it all to the point of cohesive narrative. Everything is so up in the air right now. I have to say, it's thrilling, and perhaps equally petrifying. What comes next? I'm so greatful that I'll be in a place where I'll have endless support and an environment of seemingly limitless options. Perhaps the only limitations I'll face will be self-imposed. Well, here's to hoping anyway.

The hardest part might be that I'm once again faced with the challenge of finding employment that's more than merely tolerable. I want a job that I can take pride in. I want a job where I can make a difference in peoples' lives (preferably working with kids), where I can maintain some sense of pride and personal identity, and actually make a living wage. Why is it so hard to find a happy medium between idealism and realism? Well, here's to trying anyway. Wish me luck. And if anyone has some constructive suggestions, words of wisdom, or friendly encouragement, please let me know.

Thanks to those who have been so incredibly supportive, whether it's quick emails, postcard, phone calls, or positive wishes . I sincerely appreciate it.

*peace*

v(^-^)v

Porn!

That's right guys, this place has a vending machine for everything. This particular machine sells DVD pornography. I even saw one on my way to work that sells eggs by the dozen. What a strange world.

Octopus Balls, Castles & Kittens

Today was fantastic. I met Ainz at Shinosaka station just before 10am. We decided to take JR to Osaka castle, but somehow got on the wrong train and took a 45 minute tour around the city. It would have been frustrating, but with no real plans and good conversation it was humorous and enjoyable. When we finally arrived at the castle there was a big cultural festival going on. I bought tandori chicken and nan from a vendor to eat as we walked around the castle grounds.

From there we headed off to the Namba/ Shinsaibashi/ Amerika-mura area via Tanimachi and Midosuji subway lines. We walked around for hours, enjoying the sights, the crowds and the chaos. We enjoyed takoyaki in Dotombori by the river. (I've posted some pictures to give you a better understanding). We meandered around Amerika-mura. After coffee at Tullys we found this adorable kitten that lived under the shops wooden deck. It was so affectionate, Ainsley had to remind me that I'm leaving and it's not time to be adopting new pets.

After a lot more wandering we headed to Umeda to do a bit of book shopping. Book stores with english books are few and far between in Shizuoka, so I took her to the store I found on Friday with the amazing sale section. I couldn't help but buy a few more books--they're so cheap. I finished A Wild Sheep Chase this morning and am currently reading Angels and Demons, the prequel to the Da Vinci Code.

We said goodbye around 6:30pm and went our separate ways.

I'm really going to miss a lot of things when I leave this place, and Ainsley is definitely one of them. It's hard to find friends like her. She has a maturity and ambition that I envy, and a sense of humor and optimism that is so refreshing. Lucky for me, I'll see her in three weeks in Shizuoka, and again in the future I'm sure.

Tomorrow is Monday, which means I'm headed back to work. Only 15 days of work left, though, and tomorrow I'm only on from 10am to 12:20. Not sure why, but I'm not complaining either.

For those reading--even if I don't know you--I hope all is well. Take care, and I'll try to do the same.

Future Home

This picture, taken by the beautiful Sonia, is of the view from the roof of her current home and my future home. Her apartment is in Northbeach, two blocks from Lombard St. and about ten minutes from Fisherman's Wharf "by walking" (as my students would say).

I can hardly wait to start the new adventure. I shipped off a big box of stuff today, which was less expensive than I had imagined. Granted, it won't get there for about a month, but I'm in no hurry. Two more boxes to ship in the next few weeks. 26 days until I'm on that plane--only 16 working days--not that I'm counting.

I've decided that despite my financial situation I need to make one final trip to Shizuoka to say goodbye to the friends. I hope to catch the shinkansen after work on the 11th and stay for a few days. I gotta get in one last crazy night of karaoke, you know?

Ato de, finished Persig and am now back to Orwell.

Ainz comes for a short visit this weekend, so I'm heading back to Osaka castle to say goodbye. We're also going to try and fit in both takoyaki (those octopus balls again) and okonomiyaki while she's here--a task I think we're both up to. Osaka is famous for these dishes, and I think I'm really going to miss them. On the other hand, there's so much food and beverage that I've been fiending for these past few weeks, my stomach is telling me that it's definitely time for some American cuisine.

As a bit of an afterthought, and particularly for any Japanese readers, although American cuisine is indeed hard to define, it does consist of a lot more than hamburgers and fast food. Don't judge us by your imports like we do you.

Rain, Cigarettes, Coffee & Persig

I awoke this morning to the sound of falling rain. Though I had a number of plans to fill my day, none of them really accounted for the possibility of a relentless downpour. Nothing better to do, I thought, than to head to Mister Donut with a good book to enjoy the almost painful luminescence of bright flourescents, sugary-sweet donuts (Japanese-style, of course), cigarettes, good music, and free-refills of "american-style" drip coffee. I sat there reveling in my dry surroundings, reading "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance", until the staff made it clear that I had over-stayed my welcome. I arrived home to a mailbox full of postcards and letters, many of which my former roommate David had posted from Shizuoka. *Posted, what a British term.*

I now sit in my apartment writing this entry, drinking red wine, listening to Green Day and the monotonous yet meditative pitter-patter of falling rain. Did you know that in Japan you can buy Carlo Rossi in a regular-sized wine bottle? I didn't, for those of you who might be concerned, but the option is available for those poor souls who didn't learn their lesson freshman year of college; for those who don't know any better.

I have to say, I feel a sense of contentment that I haven't managed to find in a long time. I'm sure it's been there all along the journey, hidden behind the distractions of nostalgia and the impending and unknowable future. Shit, it sounds like I've been reading too much Persig, waxing a bit too philisophical for my liking. Who, by the way, had the gall to list that book as non-fiction? It is a good read though.

-end-

(What's the html code for that Jesse?)

Afterthought Ichiban

Graffiti? In Japan? Where did I find these utterly un-Japanese images in Japan? You guessed it, Ame-mura, which translates as "America Town". Ame-mura is home to most of the tattoo shops, piercing places, foreign retailers and intriguing nightlife in Osaka. One thing I will truly miss about my time here in this alternative reality.

Stick A Fork In Me...

Yes folks, that's right, I'm done. All the mischief and mayhem is slowly but surely coming to an end, and I will leave this land of chopsticks, alcohol and indiscretion (on various levels. Oh, those ellusive and yet invasive levels). Corporate, bureaucratic bullshit weighs far too heavily on the shoulders of a proud social humanitarian with a strong resprect for REAL education. Resignations have been submitted, and flight reservations have been made. I'm sad to leave the good friends I have made--experience shows that good but distant friends are hard to keep. I'm simultaneously elated to resume the good friendships I left almost 8 months ago. I will land in San Francisco on November 16th via Chicaco, as strange as that may seem. Thanks to Rick, Sonia's dad, I've been blessed with a free plane ticket. Gotta love those frequent flyer miles. [Thank you!]. Hope to see you Americans soon and get a chance to really catch up. And ranch. I really want some ranch dressing...and good beer...and social awareness and activism. I should stop, the list could go on and on. Peace out.

Sunset @ Dotombori

Spent the day meandering my way around Namba, Dotombori and Amerika Mura, window shopping and eating takoyaki (octopus balls, but not "balls"). Met my friend Kuruha at OCAT and headed off to Osaka Dome for some lessons in break dancing and mischief making. Missed the last train by 30 seconds and spent 3000 yen on a taxi ride home. I love the weekend.